10 Ways to Deal with Travel Anxiety

My travel journey always starts with the excited planning stage. The minute I’ve booked a trip I’m like Bilbo Baggins, frolicking through the house shouting “We’re going on an adventure!”. But as the various tasks and realities of the trip come to light, I will often start to feel a degree of apprehension and worry. I have a fear or flying and severe health anxiety, so venturing into something new, whilst exciting and wonderful, also brings with it a series of worries and fears.

I relate to Bilbo Baggins on quite a spiritual level really. I love my little hobbit hole, and I’m often afraid of venturing too far, but deep down I long for adventure! We all deserve the chance to travel and see the world, and despite my apprehensions I am determined never to let my anxiety stop me from seeking adventure!

So with that in mind, here are 10 ways to deal with travel anxiety:

1. Do your research

Do as much research as you can about the country you’re visiting. Research at the culture, the history, the customs, the cuisine, anything and everything you can. Look at people’s blogs, surf the web for pictures and reviews, and let yourself become excited! The more research you do, the more familiar this place will feel when you arrive. Doing your research will also give you a confidence boost and will allow you to feel more informed and ready to explore!

2. Make some loose itineraries

This might not work for everyone, but I’ve found that forming even just a bare-bones itinerary for each trip is beneficial to me. Even if it doesn’t always unfold as planned and things change as you go along, having a plan can reduce a lot of the stress that comes with travelling. It could be as simple as writing a list of all of things that you are most keen to see and do, and then ranking them in terms of importance.

As an anxious traveller, I often find it hard to cope with too much uncertainty, but having a basic itinerary gives the trip a sense of structure. Again, this isn’t for everyone, but for me it’s super helpful!

3. Talk to your travel buddy

There’s nothing worse than having to pretend you’re okay when you’re not. If you’re travelling with someone else then try to articulate your fears and worries to them. Tell them what they can do for you in terms of support. Examples of this could be:

• Telling your partner you need them to hold your hand on the plane when you take off and land
• Telling a friend that whilst on your trip you may need some occasional alone time
• Setting boundaries within a group and vocalising any fears you have about certain activities – know that you are always allowed to say no to things!

4. Bring something familiar

This could be your favourite music, T.V shows or films, a cuddly companion like a soft toy, or a cosy jumper or pair of socks that you love. Having something that brings you positive familiar memories can help to ground you when you’re feeling anxious or homesick. T.V shows, films and music are also a great form of escapism and they can help you to get out of your head for a while if you’re overthinking and worrying. (If you bring these, remember to download them onto your device, just in case you don’t have access to WiFi!)

5. Pack an anxiety kit

Create your own emergency kit for when you start to feel anxious. Having this on hand will not only help you in those moments of stress and anxiety, but it will also give you peace of mind throughout your trip because you’ll know that it will be there if and when you need it. Each person’s kit will be very different but I like to bring:

• Lush sleepy body lotion – I find sleeping in new places really difficult and this cream has been so helpful when it comes to trying to drift off. It also smells like lavender so it is really helpful for calming panic and anxiety.
• An eye mask and earplugs – as someone who also suffers from migraines these are essential for me. When I’m feeling anxious and overwhelmed, sometimes I find it helpful to block out all sights and sounds to reduce stimulation. Most long-haul flights give you these items or you can bring your own.
• Headphones – being able to listen to music, watch a bit of YouTube or listen to an audio book when you’re anxious is super helpful. It’s a form of escapism that can soothe you and encourage positive feelings.
• The Calm app – the calm app is an absolute life saver when it comes to calming anxiety. They have meditations that can be done in less than 2 minutes, emergency calm meditations, sleep stories and music for meditation and relaxation. I would definitely suggest picking a few of your favourites and downloading them to your phone so that can access them offline.

My kit has a lot of sleep related items in it because my anxiety tends to sky rocket if I become sleep deprived! Whatever you feel will help to ground you and calm you, bring that with you and keep it on hand just in case.

For more information on strategies to deal with anxiety check out my previous post on Anxiety here

6. Be prepared

Being prepared is so important! One of the best things you can do for yourself if you suffer from any kind of anxiety is to be as organised as possible when it comes to packing your bags and sorting travel documents.

Lists are excellent when it comes to this. When you’re planning the trip, make a list of all the things you can’t forget to do like sorting out visas and photocopying passports etc… Then make lists of what you need to bring with you and have it all ready and packed the night before you leave. This way, when you wake up there’s no mad rushes and sudden panics about not having everything with you. There’s nothing worse than getting on a train or a bus to go to the airport and realising you’ve left something behind!

7. Give yourself a break

When travelling, we often put expectations on ourselves to do anything and everything we possibly can.  Maybe you’ve felt this before, or seen other travellers on social media and felt like you need to live up to that expectation. However, just because you’re travelling doesn’t mean you should let yourself burn out!

Don’t push yourself to do things that you don’t want to do. Travelling is such an individual experience and you should never compare it to anyone else’s. It’s okay to pause when you’re travelling. Take a nap, read a book, rest, watch the world go by… just give your mind and body what it needs to re-charge. Never beat yourself up for having to take breaks when you’re travelling.

8. Be Mindful

When travelling it’s important to stay mindful. The more mindful you are, the more you can appreciate the experience of travelling without rushing it. Once you’re there, just be. Don’t be angry with yourself if you don’t see everything you wanted to. Learn to see the wonder in the small things; the language, the food, the smells and the changes in the weather. Take in the atmosphere and know that it’s not all about doing as much as possible as quickly as possible. Being mindful also allows you to focus your energy on the present, and can help with feelings of stress, pressure and anxiety.

9. Keep a Travel Diary

This is, by far, the best thing that I did for myself when I went travelling. Keeping a travel diary gave me a routine in which I was able to practise introspection. The process of writing down my experiences allowed me to look at all of the positive things I was experiencing throughout my trip. It gave me a diary full of memories that I may have otherwise forgotten. This was so helpful in calming my anxiety because it allowed me to write down all of my thoughts and feelings about travelling. It was an great creative outlet for me throughout my entire trip.

10. Enjoy the journey!

Remind yourself why your travelling. Do you want to experience new cultures? To open your mind to new ideas? Travel can be such a wonderful experience. It’s important to enjoy the journey! Allow yourself to feel whatever it is you feel. Don’t force yourself to do or be anything other than exactly who you are.  Journeys are full of ups and downs, and that’s okay!

As for me, well… let’s just say I never in a million years thought I’d be sharing a sleeper train carriage with two strangers and riding on the back of a motorbike through paddy fields. Sometimes you CAN and WILL surprise yourself. This anxious little hobbit managed it, and you can too! Seek out your adventure and you’ll return home with a head full of memories, just like Bilbo.

Vietnam Travel Diary #03: Ho Chi Minh City – Delicious Pho and Breathtaking Views

I woke up with some seriously low energy after being very sleep deprived. The jet lag still had me fully and firmly in it’s grasp. But then… it was time for breakfast. All of a sudden, it was like I had been gifted a bowl of pure joy to cure all of my woes.

I’m talking about Pho…

Pho is a delicious mixture of broth, rice noodles, herbs and usually either beef or chicken. In our hotel they put a little Vietnamese meatball in there too! You can add beansprouts, lemon juice, and also red chillies if you’re up for a bit of spice! There are slight regional variants to the taste of Pho, and in the South of Vietnam the broth usually has a sweeter flavour.

After being far too cautious and eating mostly from the buffet the morning before, I decided to venture into new territory and went up to the Pho counter. As an incredibly socially awkward human being, I got very flustered when I saw all of the extra ingredients that were placed by the station. Just to put how confused I was into context… I put my lemon wedge into my broth WHOLE. I didn’t even squeeze it… I just dropped it in there like a berocca tablet in a glass of water. But the chef at the station was so lovely. She used tongs to take it out for me, and then got a new lemon and squeezed the juice into my broth. Within 10 seconds, and without speaking, she had properly instructed me on how to properly garnish a bowl of Pho.

It was so delicious. A beautiful blend of flavours and textures… With every spoonful of broth that I had, I felt better and better. You know how Popeye needs spinach to get all strong and brave? That day I needed Pho, and Pho worked. It warmed my soul and reminded me that travel is a wonderful and unpredictable experience that creates something truly priceless memories. I thanked the lady again when I left and she nodded and gave me a warm smile. She’ll never know how much she cheered me up that day.

We’d already seen the majority of the things we had wanted to see in the city the day before, so we decided to spend the afternoon chilling out at our hotel’s amazing rooftop pool.

We set up two sunbeds by the pool and had a relaxing swim. It was so refreshing up there and the views weren’t half bad either!

After we got out we sat on the sunbeds drying off and feeling the gorgeous breeze that drifted past us. We watched the occasional dragon fly come and explore the pool area. I listened to an audio book and watched the clouds roll by.

In the early evening we headed to Bitexco Financial Tower. Until January 2011 this was the tallest building in Vietnam, and you really can’t miss it! We headed up in an elevator that whisked us all the way up to the observation deck. Once you’re up there, you can see panoramic views of the entire city.

We had aimed to get there about 30 minutes – 1 hour before sunset, and luckily we made it in time to see Ho Chi Minh City both in the daylight, during the sunset, and also after dark.

This was such a wonderful way to spend our last night in the city. As I sat there, I just kept thinking about how much this skyline has changed throughout history, and how different it may look in the future.

To see my previous post all about the history and culture in Ho Chi Minh City click here

 

 

 

 

Dear Late Bloomer

 

At the age of 23, I was suddenly hit with a perpetual degree of self-induced pressure to succeed as soon as possible. I moved away from home to a very large, very loud and (for a time) very lonely city. I ventured into the unknown with a head full of anxieties and a heart full of appreciation and determination. I had been propelled into a course in London with the help of an incredible group of friends and family, and everything I had ever dreamt of doing was suddenly a reality.

I instantly put pressure on myself, not just because of how many people were rooting for me, but also because I already felt like I was so behind in life. Despite the many chats I had with friends and family, I had convinced myself that I needed to take this chance and succeed as fast as possible, and as young as possible.

When you look at the way the media glorifies young achievers, it’s no wonder  many of us feel a crippling amount of pressure to become one. As a society, for some reason, we place so much value and prestige on child prodigies and being the youngest person to achieve a certain accolade. The issue with this logic though, is that it assumes that someone reaching certain milestones in their life at a young age is more impressive than if they were in their 30s, 40s, heck even their 80s or 90s and beyond.

I have often felt like I’m so far behind other people my age because I’m reaching certain milestones later than they did, or later than I feel I am ‘expected’ to. This is a deceitful and deep-rooted thought process that it has taken me years to unpick. Expecting people to reach certain milestones by a certain age refuses to see the struggles, challenges and ups and downs of each individual. Thinking that someone is running late or growing too slow neglects to acknowledge that our paths are all wonderfully different, and we tread them with a unique stride.

Within my first year living in London I had convinced myself that there was an end point and that I needed to reach it as soon as possible. The reality was that my experience would turn out to be completely different and more wonderful than I had ever expected.

We each have a beautifully unique journey ahead of us, and life is about enjoying that ride. It’s just like Billy Joel says, “Vienna waits for you”. Life is all about change and growth, it’s about embracing what COULD be and not striving for what you think MUST be.

For me, success is measured in things like; growth, laughter, memories, travel, awareness, experiences, learning, kindness and empathy. And not one of those has an expiry date. So from one late bloomer to another, know this…

Uncertainty is scary but its okay.

Your journey is unique, nobody knows what it’s like to be you.

Don’t compare yourself to other people.

Don’t forget how far you’ve come.

It’s okay to be you, just as you are.

It’s okay to slow down.

It’s okay to not know what you’re doing yet.

It’s okay to never know what you’re true calling is.

It’s okay to reach milestones later in life.

It’s okay.

Take your time.

It’s a wonderful thing to be quiet

Have you ever been told that you’re ‘too quiet’? If you’re anything like me you’ll have heard this countless times throughout your life. Some people are perplexed by quietness and introversion. It is a very western concept that extroversion is seen as the norm and that if you’re a quieter person, you’re the anomaly or the ‘shy’ one. As a young pupil I was the quiet kid, and as an educator I became hyper aware of the quiet kids within the classroom. Being quiet, at least as far as I’ve noticed, has always been considered one of those quirks that needs to slowly be developed.

The thing is, being quiet is actually pretty awesome. Many people who are considered ‘quiet’ aren’t like that all the time. Some of us are quiet in big groups, but talk the ears off of our closest friends and family. Some of us just prefer to listen and observe. Quiet people are brilliant listeners, keen observers, and we’re often well tuned in to the world. Being quiet is different to being shy. Shyness can be related to wanting to speak and not feeling confident or comfortable enough to do so. Quietness is simply the absence of noise. What kind of a work would it be if we were all shouting over each other constantly?

Often, being quiet can bring with it some worry. I’ve sat in many a room with a many a friend or acquaintance or colleague, and felt anxious about not saying enough. At times, I’ve felt the need to try to make small talk or fill frequent silences with this and that. But in all honestly I don’t always have the urge to talk. I like looking and listening and watching and understanding and simply just being.

It’s not just okay to be quiet. It’s actually a wonderful thing. Being quiet allows us space to see and feel and witness the world around us. If you have a quiet friend, a quiet child in your classroom, or maybe a colleague who doesn’t speak up as much as the rest of the team, try to see this as a beautiful and wonderful introspective gift. We are all different, and there isn’t one fixed way to be. Loud or quiet, we each contribute something unique and important to the world around us. In loudness there is movement and flurries of revelation. In quietness there is peace, understanding and stillness, and we each make up two halves of an ever continuing conversation.

 

Why ‘giving up’ isn’t always a bad thing

We live in a society in which many of our life choices are labelled as us ‘giving up’. For example, when we hear that someone has stopped pursuing a lifelong dream, or maybe moved back into their parents home, we feel like they’ve lost out on something. We might even feel a sense of sadness and pity, and the cruellest among us might even label that person a failure. “They must be devastated”, we say. But the thing is, we can’t assume that when someone takes a turn, chooses a different path, or takes a step back, that they are ‘giving up’.

What you envisage as ‘giving up’ might be another persons life defining choice. Perhaps someone quit a high paying job in London to return home and start a non-profit organisation, perhaps a seasoned west end actress decided she wants to quit the industry to become a historian, or maybe a university student decided to leave education to start up a cosmetics company. Without knowing the full context we might see a failed business man, a washed up actress and a college drop out, but we don’t see the full picture of their decisions nor the reaping of their eventual rewards. Perhaps these people ‘gave up’ on their situations because they were unhappy, exhausted, or struggling to cope.

I always found it cruel when I heard people talking about how their friends and acquaintances had ‘given up’. Some people even take this stance when it comes to complete strangers. They say stuff like, “He’s let himself go” and ‘Wow, she could have really been something if only she hadn’t given up” etc.. etc.. and so forth. The thing is, even when we think a goal or a dream is truly worth the struggle, we don’t know how soul-crushing, life-altering and embittering that journey can be until we’re on it.

People very rarely ‘quit’ or ‘give up’ on things that make them truly happy, relaxed, content and fulfilled. Perhaps for a time they felt that way and things changed, or they were trying to fight and fight for something that made their life miserable. I know of many people who have gone through struggle after struggle and finally realised that the illustrious and almost impossible end point of their ‘dream’ isn’t even what they want anymore. It’s good to fight for things we know will end up right, to strive to see things and do things we want to do, but if the expense of all this is loneliness, bitterness and burn out, we have to decide ourselves whether it’s worth it. Unless you are significantly hurting yourself or somebody else in a profound and drastic way, you have every right to say ‘enough is enough’. The wonderful thing is that ‘giving up’ can actually lead to countless opportunities and possibilities.

It takes a lot for someone to give up on a dream, and it’s harsh of us to belittle their decision and assume that they’ve failed. I think that sometimes, it takes ‘giving up’ to understand what you really want. This doesn’t mean that the journey towards your goal served no purpose, nor that you won’t someday return to the same path. It just means you might find your way there via a new route, or a different mode of transport. Maybe you’ll take someone else with you this time, or you’ll be more cautious along the way. Life is a series of choices and events, and you should never feel judged for ‘giving up’ on something that makes you feel anything less than wonderful.